Hello Loyal Waitress Fans,
Thanks for bearing with me on my extended absence. I’ve recently returned from my solo journey around 2 continents and have landed back in the land of waitressing. It was an amazing trip and I feel so lucky to have gotten to see so many new parts of the world.
My managers were kind enough to give me my old job back, and I’ve begun collecting my ridiculous waitress stories once again!
And so, without further ado, I present to you the prank call we received this evening:
Me: “Hi, How can I help you?”
Caller: “Hi, do you have changing tables in the men’s restroom?”
Me: “Hi, no unfortunately we don’t have changing tables in either of our restrooms.”
Caller: “Oh, okay. Well, how big are your bathrooms? Is there room to change diapers in there?”
Me: “They aren’t too big but many of the parents here haven’t had a problem changing their children. I’m sure you would be fine.”
Caller: “Well do you think there is room for a grown man? I will need to change my great grandfather’s diaper.”
Me: “I’m sorry?”
Caller: “I’m bringing in my great grandfather for dinner and I will have to change his diaper at some point.”
Me: (Brief pause….) “Sir, I’m not sure if we can really accommodate that kind of need.”
Caller: “Well, what if I put down a picnic blanket on the floor and paid one of your bus boys to stand outside the door while I change him?”
Me: “Sir, I’m not sure putting down a….picnic blanket is the best idea.”
Caller: “It’s a really big picnic blanket.”
Me: “Sir I don’t really think the size of the blanket matters.”
Caller: “Well how am I supposed to change my great grandfather’s diaper?”
Me: “Perhaps you could change him before he comes in?”
Caller: “His changing needs are very unpredictable.”
Me: “Well Sir I don’t know if I can help you any further with this. Would you like to speak to my manager?”
Caller: <click> dial tone……..
Yes, my friends. It’s official. I have returned to the world of waitressing!